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Does Your Kids Make You Wanna Tantrum?

January 15, 2014 - Author: Mango

Usually you hear about theses dotting moms who think the world of their children, and dare not to express there frustration, and are always excusing their “childhood-ism”. But me, I’ve always been a “matter of fact” type of person and a mother. Let me explain. If my kid comes downstairs to find me after running into th treadmill, as she did this evening actually, to tell me she has a small scrape, and complains about it hurting…I’ll ask her “Are you bleeding?” If the answer is “NO”, then I’ll give them the side eye, and go about my business.If they pass the three questions, then I’m not worried, like:1) Are you on fire? 2) Are you bleeding? 3) Are you near death? If those are “NO” then my reaction is not to kiss the “boo boo” until they feel better, or ask them countless times “Are you alright?” Logically because you can’t build strong “future adults” if their weak as kids.
My oldest Step daughter, who I do consider my very own, but the point I need to make is I didn’t raise her, lol.
She doesn’t know how to boil water. As most bachelors, her best dish is a pack of Ramen noodles. Sad right?!All she knows how to do is bounce a basketball up and down a court and demand her mother around. I could never get away with that and I would never except that hogwash from my kids. Those 9mo were torture, and I don’t play around.
Today, I felt all productive. I went to do some community service, went to the drug store to reup on my feminine items…if you know what I mean, and I needed to get some jugs of water, and some salt for my icy driveway, something you don’t have to worry about if it’s sunny where you are. I came home rented a movie, enjoyed some cheese, crackers and yummy genoa salami, and a well deserved nap, since I cleaned like it was join’ out of style yesterday. I could bang on my chest, i felt accomplished. I also went grocery shopping yesterday and I really didn’t have to plan dinner tonight because the Hubs is working late tonight.
It’s nothing like an 8yr old that can knock you down a couple of pegs. I’ve been teaching Erinn for some months about helping with cleaning and cleaning up after herself. But she ALWAYS gets off of track. I used to didn’t believe in ADD/ADHD, but after i meet my own daughter, I take it back. Well mainly because my BIL is ADHD to the 12th power, no lie, and so is the Hubs (diagnosed), so I guess I expect it…sometimes….as long as I don’t have to have my well thought out plan demolished.
So apart of Tuesday’s chores, Dani was supposed to unload and load the dishwasher…Which took about an hour. So to my unpleasant surprise, there are my very labor intensive retrieved water jugs, that seems to be wet….
Hmmmm….”do they have a leak, because I did have to exchange on at the store that had the leak, so did I switch out the wrong one?” No, it’s Erinn…who filled up my PURCHASED PURIFIED water jugs, filled with tap water……Need I Say More?!!!!:( :( :( :(

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Stuck in a Rut!

December 31, 2013 - Author: Mango

Hello world!! I’ve been “Stuck in a Rut” for a while now. Not really writing because I’ve just been plain ole’ indecisive about what is not complaining and what is real entertainment. I still haven’t figured out “What I wanna be when I grow up”, although I’m still in school heading toward psychology. I love crazy people. Seriously!!! I get a kick out of people, that are less mentally stable. Crazy I know;)

Recently I found out that for 4 long excruciating years of my life, that what makes me less mentally stable is not “regular depression” at all, BUT hypothyroidism. Go figure. I am 30 something and I feel like I’m 60 somthin. Me and the Hubs laugh about how old I feel and act, but it seriously something that I had just started to except as a normal aging adjustment. I’ve been extremely exhausted, creaky, fat and angry for that long!!
My kids are still young enough to need me, and that’s been like the biggest burden. I haven’t had the mind to appreciate their little selves, because I’ve been in such a grim fog. I don’t want to rush their ages and milestones because it’s inconvenient for the time I’ve been going through with being off kilter!!
for the last 4 yrs, also, we’ve lived on a squeeky budget, because I’ve been mentally coo coo that I didn’t trust myself around other people’s crying kids. so recently he just got another job, which allows me to breathe a lot better now. Oh yea, and that’s come after his graduation in May. It’s been a long road.
Erinn just turned 8yrs old, and full of sass. I look at her in a new way. I resented her because she’s never been convent for my emotional rollacoaster, but now I see her differently. She’s just like me, unfortunately. My little Taylor is my little Taylor. I love her to death, because she’s been my security blanket for my emotional woes. She recently, in the Fall, started pre-school. I was really worried because she’s so stubborn, it’s ridiculous. I teach her manners, but she uses them….whenever she wants, and I’m too tired to force her. So funny because, I couldn’t stand for parents to let their kids be rude…but I get it! She needs a disclosure around her neck, just incase we meet someone who wants her to show off her manners.
It’s almost the new year, and I’m still Stuck….I’v whelped 3 people go forward with their passions and are on their way to getting paid…but me….I still feel like in some ways…like “I’m a coney”.
there’s only 3 things I’ve loved..business..writing…and medical. But how long it took the Hubs to get a decent job in his remote field was a challenge. One on the women I’ve helped at foraging forward is a phD in journalism, and hasn’t worked in her field for over 10yrs because jobs… Not that I really have to “work” but what if?! I don’t want to be worthless,lol.
I’m not the one to do new years resolutions, but it’s time for me to be passionate about my life and what I love. It’s just a coincidence that it’s at the threshold of a new year;) Any suggestions?

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They try to make it sound….(Abloggymoms Writing Prompt)

June 4, 2013 - Author: Mango

I have a little bit of a heavy topic, but it’s a topic we…meaning my family deals with on a DAILY BASIS. RACISM!
Friday was the last day of school for Erinn. Every year they have an annoying carnival, that I usually go alone to, because the Hubs has been busy for the last 3 plus years with school and his many jobs, so that I can have the luxury of staying home with our kids, and to keep away from civilization with my mental issues.
It’s actually pretty nice, but since we finally got the Hubs through school and things were slowing down, I was FINALLY not going to be alone. I think my daughter’s teachers thinks my husband is an mirage’ or a front, because they never see us together.
SO as I am conveniently running late for the picnic that their having before the last day carnival, and I live a block and a half down the street, the phone rings. I was sure it was the hubs who as looking for me, because he left his iPhone and only had his low budget work phone (I only say low budget because it has no amenities, and I can’t see when he’s typing back on that phone), and I’m late…living down the street.
I answer, it’s the Hubs.
“I got hit by a semi!” He says with heavy breathing.
I am freaked out because I can’t see it and I need to know he’s ok.
“You WHAT?!!! I yell, while trying to understand.
“I got hit with a semi, and this lady won’t pull over!!!”
“YOU BETTER CALL THE POLICE AND GIVE HIM THE TAG NUMBER!!!!! I yelled frantically. as he hung up.
I had just bought me, him and the girls a lunchable and a nice cold tea, but now my appetite was ruined. He called back..
“The lady finally pulled over…3miles away, She wouldn’t get over. She got out of the truck and said, she didn’t see me. She asked me did I call the law. I said yea I did, you wouldn’t pull over! and the lady cursed, because she knew she was wrong.”
It turns out, there was a male passenger who got out of the semi and said he didn’t see anything, he was sleep. My Hubs is a chocolate and muscular built guy, so he looks very intimidating. The police arrive and he separates them. At this point the semi driver is saying that my Hubs cut her off.
My husband got on the highway a ways back from even the accident because that’s were his job is . The semi was in the middle lane, the Hubs was in the far right lane because he would get off soon. He didn’t have to do any major turning because his exit was soon. About a mile up the road, at the exit. He was about to get off, when the semi clips him, what he thought out of nowhere. If you know the impact that can have on a little car, he could’ve spent out, and it could’ve been a lot worse.
The semi driver is swearing up and down to the police that the Hubs tried to cut her off, and the “sleeping” passenger cooperated her story.
Isn’t it pure knowledge that when you rear end someone..unless special circumstances, that it’s the rear-enders fault for failure to control their vehicle. Had The Hubs tried to cut her off, he would’ve got T-Boned…you think, going into the middle lane from the right to cut her off. Sooo… The police spent a lot of time with the semi and her male passenger, and instructed the Hubs, while he was taking pics on his low budget phone, to get back in the car, put on his seat belt and don’t be in their face. He wanted to write the Hubs a ticket based on the story of the semi lady, but because my husband has a clean driving record, he knew he wasn’t lying. The police asked “did you have your seatbelt on”…REALLY!! Was he going to give him a ticket if he said no. Needless to say, he just said that he “couldn’t” write a ticket, because there wasn’t more than $1500 of damage, and to let the insurance companies hash it out.
WHAT DOES THAT SOUND LIKE TO YOU?!
So “they made it sound like” the Hubs was reckless, and it was ALL his fault.

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A Gasp…And A Long Road…

May 24, 2013 - Author: Mango

It’s been a long road for me..I can really narrow down the road because you’ll have to ask me “which oad” and I have a story and a gasp for them all.
The 6 years gasp and a story, is the beginning and the end of my husbands journey to education-hood. He graduated with his BA exactly a year ago, and graduated just last week with his MSW…which translates into Master’s in Social Work. I can remember the day he asked me “would you mind if I went back to school?”. I really didn’t have one thought or another.
“I guess” as I shrugged my shoulders.
It wasn’t until a few months down the line I actually found out what his major was. We had just moved in and bought our first house. My 7 yr old, was barely at the threshold of a year, and I had quit my job to start my own childcare business. Ahhh…what a year that was.
He slow walked it down. I had never really been close to anyone who had a college education, so I can’t say that I actually thought, at the time, that he had the drive to complete it.
My dad’s a doctor,who I’m not really close to, but that I see often, and my grandfather was a doctor, who died before I really could grasp it all, and my stepmom has her master’s as well,in theater, but who is not doing anything remotely close to it today. But I never got to live in their systems,when they were in their prime, so I can say with acccuracy, that I didn’t expierience the cushy life….But, my friends, that is another road, a gasp, and a LONG story;)
It’s been HARD ya’ll! The wife gets no credit most times! I even remember uttering the words myself, back in my ignorant days of “Single-dom”.
“If I was a housewife, I would be popping out kids left and right…and cleaning is easy, I would love to live that life if I ever had a husband that would let me stay home”
Ignorance! *blink*blink*swallow*
I know…
It has been almost 4 years, a road and a gasp, that I closed my childcare business, because I couldn’t hold in my disdain for children, and seeping depression, that ozzed all over my face. Depression and caring for children are two of he worst in a pair. So ultimately I became The Postpartumom;)
These 4 years have been filled with moments of deep despair. I would have multiple crying spells in a day, for no reason. Single parent illusion, mainly because the hubs was always working or in school, so it’s been me and the kids…attached to the hip…whether I wanted to or not..:/ You know the attached at the hip stuff like, you’re way downstairs in the basement doing laundry, and your husband is in the kitchen, BUT the kids come all the way downstairs to ask you to give them something to drink. That’s when I have to yell back
“DO YOU SEE THAT MAN IN THE KITCHEN? WELL THAT’S YOUR DADDY!!!!ASK HIM TO POUR YOU SOMETHING TO DRINK!!! I’M NOT FLATTERED!! I’M ANNOYED!!!!
And self-fish children…but sometimes, don’t we all. My 7yr old whom has made me cry on several occasions because of her “human kindness”(I’m being sarcastic”), or them both because they have a nasty room, or fighting as usual. The hubs has lived in the library for a good portion of our marriage, and it’s not all quite over, I’m afraid.
My sister’s husband is also graduating… from Medical school in June, but he is a Emergency Room Doctor, so he has plenty of guarantees that is not exactly at our finger tips, however, I know that my husband will figure out this maze, he’s like a cat that has eleven lives, YES ELEVEN…DON’T JUDGE*cheese*;)

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Firmoo “Free” Eyeglass Giveaway!!

April 24, 2013 - Author: Mango

Hello people!!! For those who need a few more eyes than just two, such as myself, I have the perfect solution for you! Firmoo, is an online eyeglass solution website is doing a MASSIVE eyeglass giveaway for first time customers! I myself, have went through the phenomenal experience of picking and ordering a pair of glasses that became love at first sight…get it?! LOL!!
The experience is, you sift through all the unique choices of eyewear, ranging from prescription eyeglasses to prescription sunglasses.

If you are as particular as I am, you can upload your picture to fit the glasses to your face. When you package arrives, you get a cool eyeglass tool, for tightening up the screws if they become loose, and a pretty cloth for cleaning your eyeglasses. Besides getting them free, for your first time, they have great reasonable prices, unlike the neighborhood eyeglass stores that trick you with a “buy 2 pair for $78″…and when you actually get to that section of glasses in that price, they are ugly, too small for your face or slim pickins.
Do yourself a favor, treat yourself to a FREE pair of glasses, on Firmoo!

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Who’s In Control?!

April 17, 2013 - Author: Mango

So, a couple months back, I decided I NEEDED to get off coffee. because after the high of delicious coffee has came to a screeching holt, I get angry. Much like the Hulk, where I’m ready to rip things and people to shreds. So, it was the safe thing to do…right? Only thing is…I LOVE COFFEE!!! So i figured out if I dope up on some vitamins each day, the crash is not noticeable, and I can enjoy with less anger;)
For some reason, it’s been hard for me to admit things that I actually enjoy, and stand firm on the decision that I like love things. Like I LOVE tv!!! I can’t live without it! I won’t clean in a room that I can’t hear or watch it face to face!!!! I allowed my 3yr old to watch tv from morning, noon and night, and sometimes in the wee am, because she’s apparently addicted too!!!! BUT WHO CARES!!!!?? It helps my sanity if she’s happy, are we going to melt because of this habit?!! Is there a tv police coming to arrest me?!!! WHO CARES!!!!
I LOVE ALL Housewives franchises!!! I LOVE watching them pull each other’s hair out, because I never can do anything outside of, being my kids and husband’s chauffeur or maid!!! IF I didn’t have cable, I would fall deep into a depression, because tv is entertaining!! HA…There I said it!!
You know what bothers me? When I take my kids to appointments, and there is some dumb assistant/dietitian that is fat or doesn’t have kids themselves, and tells me that I need to monitor my kids sugar and snack intake, and only allow them to watch tv for 1-2 hours a day!!! What happens if I do? Hey, I know my boundaries. I’m not so skinny either, so why would I tell anyone about how to be skinny? That’s stupid! I’m just saying!

Somedays, I love my life…and somedays, I feel like running away. I often say that, and if I so choose to run for the hils, I warn: Don’t send the authorizes after me trying to locate me, it’s best that the state preserves it’s resources. I’ve shared some of this info with my mothers…which involves my mother in-law, my mother and my step mother, and they have expressed that they want to accompany me in my excursion to the hills, so it’ll be more of a party then a actually missing person’s case..you think?
Today is Wednesday, which means Erinn, my busy 7yr old gets out early, which is the dumbest thing for EVERY Wednesday, if you ask me. I actually dread those days. Quiet time never seems enough. Maybe because I go to sleep with them and wake up..so I think I can safely say, I’m with them EVERY waking hour:/ I love them, but can I go to the bathroom alone?

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Biological Clocks and Bowel Movements

March 5, 2013 - Author: Mango

Hello Out there!! It’s yet another day fo me. A small snow storm finishing up outside. From day to day, I’m still trying to figure out what I wanna do with myself…in my 30′s, is that even normal. Of coarse I’ve had a small career, that I actually went to school for, but when you get older you change. Your desires are different. What you can tolerate changes.
Motherhood is a hoax! Who said that you would have the possibility of waking up EVERY morning, and fight with your 7yr old about what to eat, what’s the next step toward getting ready for school? I think someone slipped me a mickey when I screamed
“My biological clock is ticking!!”
Somebody should’ve just hit me over the head with my biological clock, and maybe I would’ve been fulfilled enough with my freedom at the time. I’ve been coming down with some little bug for about a week, and it finally hit me hard Sunday. My throat ached, by head banged…but WHO CARES!!!??
When Mom is sick, that just means, you must continue to bug her, and not let her rest peacefully. Who is our replacement when we get sick?
I want to take up my contract!!!
If I try to run away, they will only pack thier bags along with me, since I can’t exctly go to the bathroom by myself.
Yesterday, I had to romance on the toilet, and my 3yr old proceeded to knock on the door, as if she were being hunted by a mass preditor, and ask..
“Mommy!! I can’t find my blanket”
My grandfather said, that “There will be a day when you will enjoy a good bowel movement over sex”
..and I was about to enjoy one, only they won’t let me. So I suffer from constipation and frustration.

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Have Your Kids Made You Cry?!

January 22, 2013 - Author: Mango

Erinn, my curious now 7yr old was getting ready for school. The Hubs comes up from the downstairs and throws amp key wrench in my day… As he so eloquently does often.
“How about me and Mommy come and have lunch with you this week, I can come today, and Mommy can come….Thursday?” As he looked at me.
I was angry! Why did he volunteer me to go to lunch without talking to me first. Erinn is not the kid, as most kids aren’t, easy to forget certain things that you say in front of them.
So I didn’t say a word. I was just steaming… Not to mention I had a day of doing some things that I wouldn’t be able to get to until the end of the week. So when the Hubs left the room, I tried to sweetly erase what he just said. She wouldn’t budge.
“I want you to come today, and Daddy on Thursday”
“But.. It would be nice for him to come today and me on Thursday, I had something to do” I pleaded.
“No.. You”
Then I got real angry. I held it to myself.
The Hubs left and took Erinn to school, oh but I was going to give him an ear full when he got back!
When he got back, I told him that I didn’t like that he didn’t talk to me first, I don’t like to go to lunch. This really all stems from my anxiety. Yes, I too get nervous to even be around a hundred 1st graders. I feel that they are able to pick up on the crazies. I’m not heartless, I just have anxiety!!
So FINE!!! After the Hubs ask me to work through my deep seeded issues, I decide to arrange my schedule and go to lunch. Taylor was excited, because not only was this the first day back from vactation, where she could romance in her bed and watch Dora with her chocolate milk, but she was going to school to eat a big girl’s lunch.
We arrive just before lunch. The kids are going over their Galway ettiquette. When we came in Erinn seemed to be happy. Her friend who ask me to call her mom everyday was happy we were there… But Erinn was acting strange.

As they were getting their snow equipment on, because after lunch they go straight to recess, Erinn comes over to us and whispers,
“I don’t want you here”
I thought she was just acting. A few moments later she says it again. She gets in line, and gives me this look. One I’ve never totally witnessed.
We get these clothes pins for the choice of our lunch, blue for chicken sandwhich and red for taco. Me and Taylor get one.
We walk down the hall. I tried to play around with Erinn, because maybe she’s just in a mood. But she wouldn’t budge.
“I don’t want you guys here!” She says with a little more distraction.
“We’ll I’m here, and lets just do lunch and be nice.” I say.
As we’re getting closer to the lunch area she is telling me she doesn’t want us there. I call her bluff and let her know that we’ll leave, she reminds me I have to give the clothes pins back and can’t take them home. You have to pass the exit area before you approach the lunch room. I don’t exit as we approach the exit, she points. I’m still heading to the lunch area. Erinn still notices I didn’t leave, she’s really mad now. She starts stumping as we get to the line.
I attempt to call her bluff one more time.
” we’ll leave Erinn” Taylor is starting to cry because she was excited.
“I don’t want you here!”
“Are you serious?!”
“”Go!” She says
I felt like the whole world was watching me be dogged by my own 1st grader. OMG! My 1st grader hurt my feelings, I didn’t want the whole lunch room and teachers to see me cry, so I gave the clothesline to Erinn and quickly exited. On the way out, to get Taylor on a better track, I bribed her with McDonalds, but we were both crying by the time I got to the van.
I was deeply humiliated. I was so sad! My first grader just bullied me. I don’t think I’ll be doing lunch for a while.
Have your kids set made you cry?

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A Visit to the Bates Motel

- Author: Mango

Last week I thought the hubs was a bit cray when he asked if I wanted to go to Chicago to a Lakers vs Bulls game. Not like its impossible and people don’t do it, but all the planning it takes for me to be seperates from my offspring… And not that’s a bad idea either., I love reliving my “Pre-mommy days”. It’s mainly because the hubs has been having NBA fever this year.
So there it was, before I knew it, I had booked the tickets, and it was offical. We already ordered some to see them in Minessota in Feburary, but twice in almost two weeks?! What a bonus!!!
So Sunday, in a panic, Priceline’s deals were moving the opposite way of discounted, so I was desperate. I’m quite the Lucy so I thought it would behove me to book that before we would stay in some roach motel… Well that’s exactly what kinda happened.
Silly me, trying to get a reasonable hotel within the $100 range, but decent looking, since it is just one night, and close to the United Center of coarse. So with phone in hand and iPad in another, I found another website that seemed to be cheaper. I compared, and it seemed that the rates on the iPad were cheaper for the same hotels. Howard Johnson it is! $89 no problem.
We arrive.
After a few turns around the same block, and a turn down the One Way street, I slinky escaped death, and there it was, the Queen of roach motels.
As we turned into the parking lot the advertisement so boldly stated as “free parking”, the Hubs gives me the look… Like “OH NO!”
I wanted it to be some kind of joke, or maybe this was just an extension of one of my wrong detours… But it wasn’t, it was true… I had booked her romantic, spontaneous, reasonably priced room in the roach motel.
I’ve had expierences before in the many stays in Chicago hotels, you kind of get the pick of the litter sometimes. And that could just mean you’re being escourted to the Twilight’s Zone.
I get out of the car reluctantly, and somewhat trying to show no panic in my voice to the Hubs.
“I’ll be back… After I get the key, then we can decide”
I take a deep breath and check in. Problem is, I’ve already paid for my room, I can’t exactly walk away from this deal. I get the key. We walk to the room. We get in the room. The room looks like some by the hour, wham bam thank you mam room. I would be afraid to take my shoes off in this place. The only thing modern in the roach motel was how they made the bed. There was an industrialized toilet in the bathroom… Really?! The tv was old style rear projection that still displayed snow… Really?!
No way!
I don’t really like confrontation, I’d rather the Hubs do it but, he was obviously leaving this one to me.
“Umm.. I can’t stay here..” I told the front desk lady.
She looked at me from the top o her glasses, and kind of snickered, as if she knew this already.
“I can give you a different room” the lady said
In my head I thought ” You couldn’t make me stay here for free!!”
I politely refused. I had to call up the discount company and and tell them about my ritzy accommodations. It was too cold to go outside to talk, which meant I would need to stay in her small lobby or run across the parking lot and sit in the car with the Hubs, who likes to ask me questions as if I’m not on the phone, when I’m on the phone. Non of those options were great, seeming how I had to plea my case in the presence of the desk attendant.
” How may I assist you Mrs. Chutney?”
“Yes, I checked into the hotel and I’m not happy with the accommodations” I tried to say with a clear whisper.
” Oh, I’m sorry about that Mrs.Chutney, can you give me a description of the problem?” The phone lady said.
” Yes, I don’t feel comfortable to even walk with my bare feet”
“I’m sorry, what did you say”
I was trying to be polite and not so uppity. So I had to repeat it.
” I don’t feel comfortable enough to even walk with my bare feet!” I said clinching my teeth together.
This wasn’t working so I needed to choose plan B. I got in the car with the Hubs, and sure enough, he’s trying to ask me questions and give out directions while I’m trying toake sure I’ll get a refund so I could book a much nicer hotel.
I find a nice hotel. It’s modern, classy, reasonable… There’s more where that came from, stay tuned for the second hhalf of this saga. It actually may end up pretty well;)

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Imposters!!

January 5, 2013 - Author: Mango

Have you ever thought to yourself..” What am I going to do when I’m grown up…?”, while being in your thirties? Well that’s me!! Iran, a girl has her moments too!
Yes, yes, I have kids that are looking at me to provide, but I’m really a kid myself, just able to do the dirty as I please. Hey, I just got use to the idea of me being able to buy which ever cereal I want without worrying about someone telling me know. In my house growing up, my mom only got the healthy cereal, you know, the ashes ties, Rice Kripies… That wasn’t even good cereal, you had to use loads of sugar to even make it worth eating. The box was better than the cereal, just because it had elfs on it! Frauds!!
Most times I marvel, there are little in my house that call me “Mommy”. Me…Mommy?! I’m still twelve! Soon my mom will call me to come home, because this is all a dream…right?!

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